[4 June 2021] Day 4 of fmco* in Malaysia
Image and Self-Image
A young child with missing front teeth is cute. It’s so adorable when kids flash their wide toothless grin.
Today, I am sharing something more personal. A few days ago, a friend posted this question on Linkedin. What if it’s an adult? Will missing front teeth hurt his/her image?
That got me thinking a bit. You see, I have badly misaligned front teeth. You cannot miss it. It’s been like that since I was a child. We could not afford the orthodontic services to fix it. . I spent the last couple of days thinking back and reflecting on what effect it had on me. Of course, there were times I struggled with my self-image when I was growing up.
But did it really hurt my image? Did I lose any opportunities in life because of it? I actually don’t know. I probably did (lose opportunities) but they were probably not right for me. I have not lost any sleep over this. One thing I can say is that I have been blessed with meeting kind and polite people in my life.
Did it help me? I believe it did . Because I cannot rely on my looks to open doors (wink), I focused on developing other aspects of my capabilities. And like my friend said, it makes me unique.
When I was 17 years old, a doctor did recommend I fix it. My response was “I don’t think I need to. People have to accept me for who I am.” I still feel the same today.
If you are struggling with self-image caused by something physical, realise that it is not a deal-breaker. It does not define you unless you make it so. People will see past it. Accept yourself first. When you can accept yourself, so can others. To help improve your self-confidence, here are some things you can do:
- Stop comparing yourself to others. Everyone has their own pace and their own struggles. If you find yourself doing it, remind yourself of you own strengths and successes. When you see someone succeed, genuinely be happy for them.
- Practise appreciation. Appreciate people who lift you up. Be grateful for people and things in your life. Start a gratitude diary to list down 3-5 positive things that happen to you daily. Say Thank You, especially to the Almighty.
- Practise self-compassion. Be kind to yourself when you make a mistake or experience a setback. Learn from it and know that there will always be another chance, and another, and another …
Here’s something that has been ingrained in my heart since I was 16. It’s the first stanza of The Riddle of Strider by J.R.R Tolkien:
All that is gold does not glitter,
Not all those who wander are lost;
The old that is strong does not wither,
Deep roots are not reached by the frost.
This piece is quite long for a musing. Thanks for reading. I appreciate you.
About the Author: Gina Phan is a consultant and trainer with Zinfinity Consulting. She currently conducts courses in workplace performance skills. Click here to contact her, follow her on Facebook or connect with her on Linkedin.
#self-image #firstimpression #selfconfidence #positivethinking #opportunities
#gp #ginaphan #trainergina
(Image by Jan Steen from Pixabay)
*fmco stands for Full Movement Control Order.
